The Brighter Look MOVES!

Attention faithful readers,

I have moved my site to WordPress, effective immediately. The new site:

http://www.grburkhardt.wordpress.com/

See you there!

ABL Podcast - Episodes Three and Four

As many of you know, I love the radio. My goal has always been to broadcast sports, but doing them on the radio would be even better. That's why I started the ABL podcast. It gives me a chance to talk about sports, which is exactly what I love to do. And I hope you love listening. In episode three, Carter Rodriguez tries to fuel my new love for the NBA playoffs in our NBA podcast, and in episode four, Rob Guliano and I talk about everything else: playoff beards, NHL playoffs, favorite scenes from sports movies, and we list our favorite sports media personalities. Plus, in episode four, Rob and I have another installment of "Today in Craig Sager's Wardrobe"...what a great segment. Thanks for listening!

Episode Three

Episode Four

The picture we talk about during the Craig Sager segment (aka the funfetti cake plus a carnival lollipop plus a Litebrite toy)

Sports Fan Kryptonite

This is the most dangerous sentence for a sports fan:

If (hopeful statement about your favorite team)...(pause)...you never know.

For example, I live in Athens, Ohio. I go to Ohio University. I go to school with a LOT of Cincinnati Reds fans and a LOT of Cleveland sports fans. For fan bases that have been deprived of championships (or simply winning, in Cleveland's case), that sentence has been verbally sputtered prematurely so many times that it makes the sports fan in me weep, because t's nearly impossible to avoid.

In most cases, I root for every drought-prone franchise to win - Chicago Cubs? Yup. pre-2004 Boston Red Sox? Absolutely. Detroit Lions? Matthew Stafford, let's win a ring. Philadelphia Flyers?........don't get crazy.

I want fans from everywhere to feel the joy I felt when the Steelers won the Super Bowl or the total euphoria that washed over me when the Penguins won the Stanley Cup (the second of those being much more rewarding.) But the Reds are 26-20, tied for first place in the NL Central, and I frequently have conversations with my roommate Tony that go a little like this:

Tony: WOOHOO! REDS WIN!

Grant: I saw that! Another come-from-behind win too, that's pretty sweet. Think they can keep it up?

Tony: I definitely think so...I mean if they can survive until July, get (Edison) Volquez off the DL and call up (Aroldis) Chapman, they can move some guys to the bullpen and win 90 games. 90 games wins the NL Central, or at least gets the wild card spot...You never know.

The funniest part? As a similarly woe-stricken Pirates fan (Pirates haven't had a winning season since '92, Reds haven't won a World Series since '90), I completely understand his logic. Take, for example, April 18, 2010...just a little over a month ago...my Pirates had just finished a three-game home sweep of Tony's Reds, were 7-5 and were a half game out of first place. Conversation, please (note: ever since NBA teams started using "Los (nickname)" on their jerseys, we've called the Pirates exactly what I did in this conversation):

Grant: LOS BUCCOS! They win again!

Jason (friend from Pittsburgh): Dude, stop. You do this every year. Just stop.

Grant: But seriously! If they can sustain this pitching until June, they can call up (Pedro) Alvarez, stick him at third, move Andy Laroche - who's batting almost .400, by the way - to second, and have a killer lineup! Dude, you never know!

There was room for optimism in Pittsburgh. All the Pirates had to do was compete in their next series, a three-gamer at home against Milwaukee, a team Pittsburgh never plays well. Even if they won one of three, but genuinely competed with the Brewers, I'd have been one happy fan. Heck, 8-7 in the first fifteen games is 86 wins in a season!

Series result? 

Game one: Milwaukee - 8; Pittsburgh - 1. 

Game two: Milwaukee - 8; Pittsburgh - 0. 

Game three: Milwaukee - 20; Pittsburgh - 0.

My team fell flat on its face. Bye-bye, optimism.

So I've finally figured out that this is not only a problem, but a genuine disease. Attention championship-deprived sports fans: avoid the You-Never-Know syndrome. Symptoms include: throbbing headaches, misplaced hope way too early in a season and mindlessly believing that the plot from "Major League" could actually happen.

The You-Never-Know syndrome - the kryptonite of all sports fans. 

"But Grant, is there an antidote besides finally winning a title?"

I wish I had a better answer for you, friends, but there is not. However, if you believe you have the symptoms of YNK, there is a silver lining. 

You're completely normal. There's no way out, but having hope, even when misplaced, is better than having no hope at all. If you never have hope, you weren't a fan of that team in the first place. 

Because, for me, I'd rather have hope at 26-20, 7-5 or even at 0-0 than to start the season saying, "there's no way this is our year. I know it isn't."

So, winning-deprived fan bases, please keep the faith. Because you just never know.

-----------------------------

Stay tuned for episodes three and four of the ABL podcast, when Rob Guliano joins me to talk about our favorite sports media personalities, and when Carter Rodriguez makes an appearance to fuel my sudden liking for the NBA playoffs.

ABL Podcast - Episode Two

Episode two of the ABL podcast is uploaded to the site! In the second episode, Tanner Smith and I talked about the NBA/NHL playoffs, mustaches, bad wardrobes, more crowd colors, and our favorite scenes from sports movies. Enjoy!

Link to the ABL podcast - Episode Two

Green Men:

Hilliard Davidson Pranks Hilliard Darby Fans:

Our favorite sports movie scenes - the number ones

Tanner's favorite scene from a sports movie:

Grant's favorite scene:

Today in Craig Sager's Wardrobe - the Exploding Cantaloupe:

Trey Hillman - former KC Royals manager and owner of a great mustache:

ABL Podcast - Episode One

I have a new wrinkle to "A Brighter Look."

Podcasting. Short, fun, more personal audio files of me talking sports. Don't worry, I'll keep writing on the site, but talking is just so very fun, so I'm taking advantage.

Here's the link to the first ever ABL podcast.

A few things for you, now the listener, to know:

1. I'm asking for you to be a part of my cast. How can you do that? EMAIL ME. abrighterlook@gmail.com is the way to get in touch with the podcast and get your opinions heard. This week, if you listen, I'm asking you to submit your favorite crowd color (Penn State white, Golden State Yellow, etc.)...so you should definitely do that. I'll be reading the responses on the cast next episode.

2. This is just a trial thing for me, so if there's any way you think I could improve it, please let me know. I really enjoy radio, and since I can't quite broadcast radio straight to your ears, this is the next best thing.

Here are some pictures of the best crowd colors:

1. Penn State - White

2. Golden State - Yellow

3. Philadelphia - Orange

4. Champions League - Multi-colored (aka - making us look like amateurs)

Why the NHL Should be Rooting for Boston to Win the Cup

A few things for you to understand before I make this statement:

1. I'm from Pittsburgh, so the Penguins are my team, but in general I love hockey more. I think it's one of the two best sports in the world and I'd like nothing more than the sport that I love to have an NFL-sized fan base and a big TV contract.

2. Along those lines, the NHL is an extremely regional league. In most cases, the majority of a franchise's fans live (or have lived) very close to their team.

3. For reasons I can understand - it's the same way with me and the NBA - if you weren't "born" a hockey fan, you aren't currently a hockey fan.

4. More people read ESPN.com articles now than ever before, especially those written by Boston-native Bill Simmons, who has an absolutely enormous readership (for good reason).

So, that being said, the NHL advocate in me wouldn't totally hate it if the Boston Bruins won the Stanley Cup.

Before you Pittsburgh fans rush my dorm room to tar and feather me (obviously the correct punishment in this situation), I want you to consider a few things:

- If Boston were to win the Cup, the likelihood that the ever-popular Simmons would write post-season articles about hockey would skyrocket.

- In turn, his readers, hopefully in bulk, would at least entertain the idea of finding Versus on their televisions (a tough task) and watching amazing athletes play a sport on a sheet of ice. (Let me repeat: hockey players do things that other athletes do - pass, shoot, score - but they do it frozen water.)

- It's possible that some of those readers who weren't hockey fans before would be turned on to the game.

- the NHL might be able to overcome the regional nature of the game and attract fans from non-NHL cities.

- And hockey fans wouldn't have to deal with explaining themselves when asked the condescending question: "How can you like hockey? You can't even see the puck!" (the equivalent of "I've never watched a game in HD before!")

But because we can't rely on Gary Bettman to market the NHL, I'm saying it's now up to Bill Simmons to get the word out about hockey.

The problem is: by the time Simmons would write an article about the Bruins winning the Cup, the season would be over and there would be no more hockey for these new fans to watch...and that's a shame, because if that were the case, the commish wouldn't know what to do with all the new publicity. He'd probably just blow yet another chance to market his league. All the intrigued potential hockey fans would have no hockey to watch, and thus, to the casual sports fan who's bored by the thuggery and bad refereeing of the NBA or the horrible economics of MLB, the zeal of the new, fast, exciting NHL would fade away forever.

Penguins over Bruins in seven if they meet in the Eastern Conference Finals.

So this doesn't even matter. It won't happen. Go Pens

Thanks for reading.

A Brighter Look...BACK!

After a long delay, the ABL is back. I'm sure your life lacked without my shallow, sports-obsessed thoughts, but I hope this blog provides a little ray of sunshine for your day (See what I did there? Sunshine? "Brighter Look?")

Anyway, I'm quite excited to get back to writing, and as many of you know, I'm not shy about sharing details of my life with anyone. I'd be happy to tell you my life story, but I know that you really don't care. You want my take on sports. And that is absolutely fine, I like it that way. What I would like to do though, mostly to get me back in the writing groove, is to re-acclimate you to Grant Burkhardt the writer, the person, and the sports fanatic. So here are a few things about me.

1. I am, without a doubt, the worst text-messager in the history of cell phones. If I'm texting you and you go hours without getting a response, it's not because I don't like you...I just get sidetracked and forget. So, in advance, I'm sorry.

2. I think there are very few things better than the post-cereal drink of milk. Seriously, eat a bowl of cereal and tell me you weren't just ecstatic to get to the milk, which tastes remotely like the type of cereal you were chowing down.

2a. Favorite cereal: Special K

2b. Favorite post-cereal milk taste: Cheerios

3. Is there anything more demoralizing than your team having a bad start to the baseball season? As a baseball fan, there's nothing worse than your team losing 14 of its first 20 and leaving you saying, "oh gosh, we have to play 140 more of these wretched games? You're KIDDING ME!" I love baseball, but something has to be done to avoid the season being essentially over for Pirates fans before May even begins.

3a. Just saw Dodgers pitcher Hiroki Kuroda give up a bomb to left-center field...random MLB salary figure of the day - Kuroda is making $15,400,000 this season...and he's 19-17 as a starter in the majors. Like I said, something needs to be done here.

4. For the first time in my life, I have the ability to stand up straight, bend at the waist and touch the ground. Thank you Tony Horton and p90x.

5. I've learned that when Tiger Woods says he's changing his life, he doesn't mean the way he deals with reporters. Tiger's post-round interview on Sunday at Augusta revealed that to me. The reporter asked Woods to put this week into perspective...you know, LIFE perspective. And Tiger's response was "I came in fourth."

Yeesh. Yup, he's still a robot.

6. 43 days until the World Cup. USA! USA! USA!

7. Sometimes, my friends and I will have entire conversations that are made up of movie quotes. Don't feel bad...no one besides us can understand what we're talking about, which, most times, is absolutely nothing. I wish I could give you an example, but I fear you'd just stop reading my writing forever.

8. There is no bigger compliment you can give me than to say, "I can hear you talking when I read your writing."

9. I had dinner the other day with a die-hard Cleveland sports fan and I posed this question for him: If you could have all the players who have plagued Cleveland sports in the last 30-plus years together at one press conference (John Elway, Tim Couch, Michael Jordan, etc.) with their intention being to apologize to you for having wronged your city and deprived you of championships, would that make you feel better?

His response: "NO! Because then all anyone would have to do to antagonize us is to hold up a picture of that table of Cleveland anti-Christ's and we'd have no response."

My thought: "I'd have that picture framed and hanging in three different places in my house."

10. Ever wonder what happened with the Walrusman column I wrote back in the fall? I've had people ask, so here's the fallout:

-Somehow, Walrusman found the blog post, printed a bunch of copies, and called me out during class about it. No joke. There was a split second where I was legitimately frightened, but then I realized that I had become a member of the journalistic organization of "Writers Who Have Ticked Off Their Subjects" and then I thought the situation was hilarious.

-He made me sit in the front of the classroom (5th grade style) for the rest of the quarter and made an extra-special final exam (with my name already typed in at the top and on different color paper) for me to take.

-As I made the Walk of Shame to the front of the room, he read off some of my not-so-subtle haymakers aimed in his direction, and then threatened to sue me for "Defamation of Character."

-Then, in a hilarious, not-so-fluid verbal gesture, he mentioned that his tested IQ was 175, turned to me, and said "Grant, what's yours?"

-Then at the end of that particular class period, he offered to pass out copies of my column to the roughly 60-person classroom. My thought? More hits for my site. Is that bad? Ha! No!

11. Writing letters is a passion of mine. I don't get to do it a lot, but there's something about the tradition of it that lures me in, sort of like how black-and-white movies or radio broadcasters or Frank Sinatra will never get old.

12. Speaking of the radio, I'm going to be starting a podcast/online radio show for the Champs Sports Network, and I need some help from you. As of now, the show will be called "A Brighter Look with Grant Burkhardt" and it will be broadcast live weekly on CSN with segment ideas like "Today in Craig Sager's Wardrobe" among others.

What I'd like to hear from you is what ideas you have for show segments and for the title of the show. Don't like "A Brighter Look?" Tell me what you'd rather have the show called. I only get a limited number of views on this site (except, of course, when i talk about Walrusman), but I do value your opinions.

As always, thanks for reading.

Stupid Tape Delay Can't Ruin Vancouver for This Fan

Lindsey Jacobellis (my hopeful pick to win Gold in snowboard cross) didn't qualify for the finals of her event. More disappointment for American sports fans (I always root for the good stories...who doesn't). Watching that race sucked. But what's worse is I already knew what was going to happen. I curse thee tape delay.

As it seemingly always is, my knowledge was totally unintentional. Sitting in our campus newsroom, I glanced to the left wall where three televisions are mounted and saw ESPN's graphic..."Lindsey Jacobellis Fails to Qualify for Snowboard Cross Final"...crap. Media really has to put a stop to this.

Meanwhile, there's a lot to catch up on in these last few days of the Olympic Winter Games. I'll try to go quickly:

- Nordic combined (and cross country skiing in general) was so, so much fun to watch. America had never won a medal in the event entering 2010 and the U.S. had two competitors (nordickers?) in the front pack entering the last turn. Johnny Spillane had the lead...and then he lost it. But a remarkable silver medal in a remarkable race was...well...remarkable.

Meanwhile, if you saw this race, you saw a disturbing trend evolve. NBC's play-by-play announcers are getting snowed in by some obnoxiously loud color commentators. As the exciting finish of the race was happening, the play-by-play announcer didn't stand a chance against his side-kick. I'm sure the play-by-play guy doesn't have quite as much knowledge as the specialized color guy does, but it's just getting ridiculous. Which leads me to my next point:

Just because you played the sport doesn't mean you can talk about it on television. Thank you.

-Pairs figure skating is beautiful. I don't care what you say, pairs figure skating is beautiful. Have I gotten my point across? My friends and I watched so much of the pairs competition that the only question we could ask was this:

How much of the skaters' training consists of "gaining body chemistry"? With all the positions figure skating pairs end up in, doesn't it make sense that the two would have to be comfortable with each other? You know? Ok, I'm done now.

-The curling tournament started!!!

-Best moment of the Games so far? Canada wins Gold. Alexander Bilodeau, in yet another fantastic moguls competition, won Canada's first home-soil Gold medal. But it was quickly followed by this:

-Most disappointing moment of the Games so far: NBC's botching of Bilodeau's medal ceremony. When American Hannah Kearney won Gold and the Star Spangled Banner was resounding through BC Place, viewers saw a wonderful montage of creative camera shots that melted hearts everywhere (or maybe it was only mine).

But when Bilodeau was on top of the podium, and "Oh Canada" started to play, what I saw was drastically different. With tens of thousands of proud Canadians in the crowd, NBC's feed showed one thing, Bilodeau's face. No shots of Canadians singing and smiling and waving flags. No shots of the flags rising in the distance while the camera is behind the medalists backs. Nothing. Disappointing.

But the Games go on. With Bob Costas' tweed jacket and Al Michaels' fireside chats keeping my excitement level through the roof, my dorm room will continue trying to set the mark for longest time consecutively watching the Olympic Games. I really don't think we've turned off NBC in 90 hours.

But what's most exciting about our Vancouver addiction? We have a second TV in the room.

I'm making it the CNBC TV.

All curling, all the time.

Go USA.

Thanks for reading.

p.s. Do you like buzzer-beaters? Here's a great one...first round of the playoffs, Vinton County (in dark jerseys) down two with two seconds to play...Tori Dixon defines what it means to be a "Hardwood Hero"

Olympics = Easy to Love

If you're not watching, you're missing out.

In a matter of three hours - not to mention it was only day one - the world saw an incredible amount of incredible moments:

-Holland's Sven Kramer won the 5000m long track speed skating event and then gave the international viewing audience its first look at a truly Olympic celebration. Kramer jumped the outer railing, basically hurdled another obstacle and embraced his family all in one passionately emotional show of happiness. There are no boring Olympic moments.

-A bit after 8:00 p.m., Apolo Ohno decided to tell tell his first heat in the 1500m short track that they didn't train nearly enough with a passing move that could only be called legendary...or an every-race occurrence, in Ohno's case.

-Then in the final of that same event, no one needed a seat as the Koreans swept the medals and kept Ohno and fellow American J.R. Celski off the podium.

-BUT WAIT! Two of the Koreans collide and crash into the padding! America takes Silver and Bronze! Amazing! (Note: At this point, I really wanted an American flag to drape around myself while I sung (screamed) the national anthem...if only I knew what was to come in twenty minutes...)

-The night's best moment: We'd been following the women's moguls competition all night, and when the finals came around, I found my allegiance being strongly challenged. See, I'm a genuine sports fan. That means I like good stories, genuine athletes, and wonderful competition.

So...with Canada's well-publicized home-soil gold medal drought riding on Jenn Heil and Hannah Kearney standing at the starting line as the last moguler to ski, I was quite torn. I wanted Canada to get off the schnide so badly, but I wanted America to break through and win its first gold of this Games. But the best part? No matter what happened, I was going to be thrilled for the winner, and that's what the Olympics are supposed to be about - rooting for everyone like golf fans root for everyone (except Vijay Singh).

Kearney crossed the line after a nearly-flawless run and we were awaiting final judging. Oh, the suspense that only the Olympics can bring. When we saw the (Rank: 1) on the screen, the room exploded. The only thing missing from the fully-American celebration was, again, a Flag...pity.

We'll get one soon, don't worry.

Thanks for reading. I love the Olympics.

In The Olympic Spirit

My pity party is done. It's over.

I'm sick and tired of hearing about what a great hockey team the Soviets have. Screw 'em!...wait, where did I just go?

Really, I just wanted to tell you, the people who voted for me (hopefully), about what ending up happening with the contest. I was distraught about it, and a lot of emotion spilled into "Devastation", which I probably should have edited and torn apart before posting.

Meanwhile, although I'm not happy about the situation, now that I'm back at school, I haven't had much time to mope around. I'm co-producing a high school basketball show, single-handedly running the website, taking midterms, trying to stay in shape (by dancing), hopefully remembering to eat and actively learning another language (Spanish), among others. But you know what?

To hell with it. I'm going to blog about the Olympics anyway.

Take THAT, Man.

I always love watching the Olympics, no matter which season. I love watching the Olympics, even if my roommates refer to the Winter Games as the "Fake Olympics" because they don't know the names of anyone competing (they would mutter "fake" under their breath every time someone would ask me about the contest). I remember watching The Greatest (start at 5:50) light the Torch when I was just six years old, and I still get chills now.

The Torch is one of the greatest objects in sports. Think about it, for an entire year, a stick-on-fire is carried by many and watched many countless more. People bare bitter cold to see a person run past them wielding fire. It's like the Tour de France minus extremely uncomfortable seating arrangements for the participants.

I love watching the Olympics for so many reasons, and I think you should know about them. So, for the next few weeks, starting with the Opening Ceremony, I'm going to blog about what I (unfortunately) will watch on TV. And I couldn't be happier (Olympic Spirit = unrivaled).

For starters (and those who are uninformed, like my jerk roommates), here are a few stories to watch:

1. Can Vancouver bring the heat?

I'm sure Vancouver will be a phenomenal host city. Honestly, I cannot wait to see how they open the Games tonight. I think it will, as always, be a phenomenal blend of culture and pizzaz. I'll probably learn more about Canada tonight than I've ever dreamed of knowing before. But the "Heat" that I'm talking about is the literal temperature of the Olympic Village and its beautiful surrounding areas (in pictures, of course...I've never been there, remember?). The average temperature for Vancouver in February is around 35 degrees Fahrenheit, aka not capable-of-snow. Actually, until yesterday, the word was that crews were working around the clock to move snow (from as far as three hours away) onto the ski slopes. But, Mother Nature was overcome by Olympic Spirit and decided to dump some snow on British Columbia. As if I ever thought she would get in the way of the slalom.

2. In my opinion, the biggest story on the slopes is...

Not Lindsey Vonn (or her spread in SI's Swimsuit Issue), but another United States Olympic medalist - Lindsey Jacobellis. At the Torino Games, Jacobellis was absolutely cruising to Gold in the Snowboard Cross, when she tried for some extra style...and lost. Watching that was heartstring-tearing. Like 2005 Memphis/Louisville. It just made you want to weep. So what's going to happen in Vancouver with Jacobellis? She'll be on the podium again. And this time, she'll be Golden.

3. All curling, all the time

Guilty pleasure #2134085 = CURLING. I spent more hours watching CNBC (I swear that network broadcasted curling 16 hours a day...'Cause NoBody Curls) during Torino than I did doing homework. The U.S. team took Bronze in '06...and will hopefully medal again, but if Team Canada's boisterous voices are any indication, they should win Gold. Screaming at teammates who hold brooms = directly related to curling success. (Note: I tried to find a YouTube video of curlers screaming, but they're few and far between...here's all I found).

4. How many times will I curse tape delay?

Answer: multiply the amount of events I watch by the number of times I fail not to log on to the internet while watching said events and you get a very frustrated sports fan. Seriously, there should be a worldwide law that bans media outlets from broadcasting the winners of events until the public has seen them. I know that's probably impossible, but I can dream...right?

Tape delay is the only horrible thing about the Olympic Games. And gosh, it's worse than a BCS/Bud Selig love child. Think about this: if you wanted to know, you could have found out the score of the "Miracle on Ice" before you watched it. You're sitting in your living room thinking, "I wonder how badly the Russians beat us this time?"...so you turn on the local news and BAM!...out of nowhere, the TV reads "USA - 4, USSR - 3". Do you believe in miracles? Really, the question should be: do you believe in miracles that you already know the ending to?

Go World.

As always, thanks for reading. I love you.

By the way, I've been asked to post the link to Team USA's news site...check it out!

Devastation.

In my long-awaited return to the internet...this was one of those posts I wished I'd never have to write.

The title was either going to be "SUCCESS!" or, unfortunately, what it is now.

I was hoping to be so happy I could dance, but now I'm more upset than I've ever been.

This is NOT such A Bright Look, sorry.

I hope you understand.

I like to make sports analogies (if you didn't know that, welcome to my blog!), so I'm going to make one that seems extremely fitting right now.

I was watching the Cardinals/Packers game a few weekends ago, and my friends and I were yelling and screaming at seemingly everything that happened during the game. Touchdowns (there were plenty), penalty calls, anything, you name it. But when your team (in this case, most people in the room were rooting for Green Bay) loses on a last-play-of-the-game-type moment, usually the viewing area becomes completely silent. That's the way it was when the Cardinals returned a fumble for a touchdown - no one said a word. There was too much disappointment.

I told you that story so I could tell you this one...

I love my mom.

She is the most wonderful person on this planet.

But my mom doesn't know the silence rule.

She's that person who asks a zillion questions immediately after your team loses in overtime and all you want to do is sulk in your chair and stare blankly at the television. So when we were sitting in my room talking on the morning of Christmas Eve, my mom unknowingly piled on. I was on my computer, and I read something that made the emotion drain from my face so quickly that my mom knew exactly what happened, even though I said nothing.

On December 24, 2009, I found out that I lost the Olympic Blogging Contest.

I didn't get beat, no. Absolutely not. See, to get beat, the person who beat you has to be better than you are. That was nowhere near the case. Somehow, someway, I lost. Did I break the rules? Can't see where that happened. Did I not write enough? Uh, only four times as much as the guy who I lost to. I don't get it. Good luck getting the kid who posted three times per month to blog roughly five times a day.

(The worst part? [Besides being told on Christmas Eve, of course. Hey Grinches! Really awesome timing!] Reminders are everywhere. Snow. Coats and Jackets. Every Morgan Freeman commercial. Stephen Colbert's sponsoring of USA speed skating. Every time someone asks about the contest. And every time, until now, that I've had to lie to you about "not knowing how it's turned out yet." Recently got an email from a psychology professor, Dr. Vancouver (really). My friend from high school is working the Olympics for NBC. I turned on the radio ten minutes before our campus' sports talk show and heard two people talking about how the Canadian ski team is extremely excited to win gold in Vancouver. The list goes on and on.)

Back to my room on 12/24/2009, I didn't want to talk to anyone. I put my head between my legs, closed my eyes, and said nothing. My mom, however, asked all the questions that would eventually need to be asked, only at exactly the wrong time...all at once.

"Whathappened?How?Whowon?Areyoukiddingme?Howdidyoufindout?Thisdoesn'tmakeanysense!Whotoldyou?That'sridiculous!HIM?SERIOUSLY?Theyhavetobekidding!Grant?Saysomething!"

I was perusing Facebook (yes, I was told on the internet) and there, on the group page that had been created so the contest sponsors could be in "communication" (quotes for sarcasm) with the semi-finalists, there it was:

Winner: Not Grant Burkhardt.

NO!

It was a cruel joke, right? The kid who doesn't like sports is going to be blogging from the biggest sporting event in the history of Earth? You're kidding. Honestly, go to the link and start reading, if you make it through a whole post without being bored senseless, I'll give you the "Blogathlete" t-shirt that I got from the contest.

(side-note: now look, I'm not saying I've never made a mistake in my writing. That would be purely fictitious, but here's an excerpt from a winning post...

"The following day included a family/friend viewing of the Kansas University-Missouri University football game. Now I have never been much for watching football and I hold little knowledge of the sport beside the fact that I like seeing big hits, but considering my (hopefully) future school transfer is slightly religious about football and basketball I figured I should start paying attention. It was a good game and the heated rivalry definitely kept things interesting and I actually found myself very interested in the game and even began to kinda follow what was going on."

And you thought I was kidding about him not liking sports. First, I'd like to point out "Missouri University." Really, bud? Not the "University of Missouri?" That's like Terrelle Pryor saying that he had signed with the University of Ohio State. I won't say more about the actual writing, other than this: according to the rules of the contest, 20 points out of the 100 point scale judges were supposed to use to pick the winner were for "grammar, clarity, usage, and overall organization" and another 40 were for "relevance to the Olympic blogging opportunity." Please.)

It could have been anyone else, and I would have been able to rationalize it in my head. Christie, the skating guru - wonderful writer whose site is updated nearly every day - totally deserving. Or Jake, the skier - one of the most awesome sites I've seen - let's hit the powder. But no. Not them, and not me. Zero sense, sir.

But before I rant and rave more about this and that, I'm going to stop myself. And I'm going to speak directly to anyone involved in the voting. I would like to speak with you.

Ultimately, this comes down to your decision, and now I'm going to tell you why you're wrong. Dead wrong. (This will be the first and last time you will read me saying how good I think I am. I joke about it sometimes, but this is serious.)

What you failed to realize, when you were "judging" the entries (and I'm starting to doubt you even visited a single site), is that I can write and have written about literally anything. Experiences? Check. Life? Myself? Other people? Sports? More checks. I could write about any subject in any situation, and I could make it great. Drying paint? Yup. Watching grass grow? No problem. Chess? Checkmate.

You know when you do something bad and you're not so much worried about your parents being angry as you are about them being "disappointed?" Sure, I thought disappointment was the worse emotion too. Well, people of earth, we have drastically underestimated the power of anger. Because you, voters, just made me mad. And that's why I'm done telling you that you're wrong. Because for the next 60 years, I'm going to show you why you're wrong.

Congratulations. By being blind, you motivated me. And if you know anything about me, you'd know that was the last thing I needed. Good luck in Vancouver to the winners. You're only representing the company that invented the personal computer. But whatever, no pressure dude.

So yes, I'm slightly bitter (still now) and I hope I don't come off as too big a sore loser (possible), but, as always, I have since found a silver lining.

You.

Since I got the call about being a semi-finalist until now, the outpouring of support from you has been astounding - my Facebook group had over 650 members, I had people telling me spontaneously that they were voting for me everyday, I had more views on my page than I ever had before, and heck, I didn't even know some of the people contacting me to say "good luck!" - this experience, though emotionally draining, has been incredible. And I wish I had good news for you. But honestly, I cannot thank you enough. To think that so many people would rally behind a college kid in support of a ridiculous dream is something I will remember for a very, very long time. I just wish I had pulled through for you. I wish I was the one helping you see Vancouver through my words. But more than ever, I truly believe the heart of life is good. And that's because of you.

Thank you for reading anything I write simply because it has my name attached. And I hope you continue to do the same in the next half-century. I love all of you. So, so much.

I still can't wait for the Olympics.

p.s. on the other side of the draw (the women's side), Amber won, and she, along with a few others, were very deserving, so voters went one-for-two...Hey Apple, if you ever have a contest like this (no doubt one that will run like Snow Leopard), I'd like to be considered. Thanks.